Another chance to take to Beginners guide to the 10 Commandments for free (for the next five days)

Wow! I would like to thank everyone for the great response to my last Blog. All 100 coupons were used. I am frankly blown away and very appreciative to everyone who signed up.

I have decided that for the next five days I will make the course available to everyone who wants to get it for free (remember you will not be charged anything, no financial info needed, and your check out should show zero dollars owed.) Just click the link

Or you can also access it if you

go to type in A Beginners Guide to the 10 Commandments and when prompted type in the coupon code


Thank you again. Since I have extended this giveaway for the next five days, feel free to pass this info on to anyone you know that may like it.

Thank you all again.

I look forward to seeing what you think about it. I know that there is room for improvement and hope to keep improving and learning as I go.

Totally Free, “Learn about the10 Commandments” Class… No commitment

FREE 10 Commandments Course

A Beginners Guide to the Ten Commandments.

The coupon is Good for the first 100 Responders!

The above course is one that I first created (my first one) a few years ago.

At the time both the microphone, audio and video editor were very basic and as a result I got the rating of 2.5 (the person , in a survey, stated the content was good the videos were not).

After that (fairly enough) no one else took the course.

Since then I bought a better microphone, and audio and video editors as well as a subscription to a place where I can make colorful and engaging videos.

If you find that you have any free time in the next month I am humbly requesting that you consider clicking the link and taking the free course.

If you like it, rate it as high as you feel you can.

And if you don’t like it then if you would please send me an email and I will do my best to find a solution.

Udemy should NEVER ask you for any financial information (because it is free), and the price in the cart should be zero.

Alternatively you can go to Udemy Type in A Beginners Guide to the Ten Commandments and then enter in FREE10CLASS.

I have poured hundreds of hours into creating the 187 videos for the second time.

Why, when I have zero guarantee of success?

Because I AM TRUSTING Gods leading in my life. He has given me the gifts of teaching and creativity.

He has put on my heart to write and design courses.

I hope to continue to do so, getting better as I go.

But I do not want to waste my time in an area that is showing no fruit.

That is why I humbly request that you consider taking the course, and giving me feedback.

That way, I will know that the results will be based on the content, not the lack of good equipment.

Thank you in advance. I appreciate any help that you give.

I will be giving a 20% discount on any future courses to anyone who takes the course.

Thank you again for considering A Beginners Guide to the Ten Commandments.

The coupon is Good for the first 100 Responders!

Have a blessed day.

Kittens, Cookies, and Deadly screams

It’s funny how fast life goes. Isn’t it? I mean first you’re five years old sitting in a cul-de-sac watching the older kids ride their bikes dreaming of the time you can do the same. You blink then you’re in 1st grade, then 5th grade, then middle school, and before you know it, you’re graduating. And then somewhere between then and now you find your person. And you start a family. You blink and they’re now starting families of their own. Your life now filled with people, projects, and those darned memories that pop up once in a while and remind us of who we used to be.

I had such a memory recently. Let me say at the outset it’s not my favorite memory. In fact, it is one of my least favorite. And yet here it is, popping up all the same, over and over again. I felt the nudge to write about it and here we are.

Though I warn you ahead of time, if you choose to read on,  the ending is weak.

 This story took place within the first few days to the first week after my husband passed away from cancer at only 49 years old.

When I had  recited “till death do us part” almost 19 years previous, I had no idea that was actually going to happen so soon.

At the time of this story, my best friend, Allan went into the hospital and was gone within four days.

4 days.

 I was 41 with four kids at home and was in complete and utter shock. I mean this couldn’t happen to me, could it?

The shock and grief were so great it was all I could do that first week to just try to keep breathing, and make sure my children did as well.

My family has always been everything to me. Allan and I had our first child together when I was  21. We married when she was one and a half. And later had three more children.

For most of the marriage he worked, and I stayed home with the kids,  though that changed off and on a little bit over the years. He was a blue-collar worker and money was always tight. As one child put it “we never had money to go to on fancy vacations [to that I would add really any vacations] but I always knew you’d love me and that was enough.” Not only were vacations scarce, but so were many extras. That’s why when I made chocolate chip cookies my kids absolutely loved them.

So did Allan. For every time I made the kids some, I secretly made him an extra batch (with walnuts) and he would  hide them so that he would have some to take to work.

I never really knew where he’d put them, never thought about asking. I was just happy that I could make him a treat, he worked so very hard.

That might have been why it hit me so hard.

Like I said it was the first week maybe within the first few days after he died. I remember my daughter and her friend were in my room and I was asked by my youngest son if he could see the kittens who were sequestered in my walk-in closet (the closet door open with a baby gate). The kittens were about to be given away, so I relented.  He was young, so I wanted to keep an eye on him with the kittens.

I remember going into the closet and just sitting on the floor with my back against the wall, watching him play.

I don’t know what made me do it, but something made me look up. I saw the corner of a plastic bag and I immediately knew what it was.

I stood up I grabbed the bag where he had hidden it behind some clothes. I’m not sure how long it had been there. and I’m not sure what it was about seeing this batch of cookies, but what I do remember is the scream that emanated  so from so deep within me, that when it escaped it must it rattled windows within a 10-mile radius.

My daughter and her friend were there in a flash, sitting with me and reassuring me as I continued to scream (btw I am not a screamer usually, so you can imagine everyone’s surprise), helping me out of the closet, and into bed after gently taking the cookies from my hand.

That’s it that’s the memory.

 I cannot tell you what preceded that memory nor what came after. Just the loss, the closet, the scream, and the help.

To be honest for the last week I have felt a nudge, repeatedly,  to write about this memory. But I have not wanted to go back.

It has been 14 years and though I never dated again, and I have healed emotionally and moved on, thinking about it put me back there.

I started out this blog post by saying the ending was weak. That is because I have had no idea why I reacted in the closet like I did.

Why scream over cookies?

Then I realized it was not about cookies at all.

It was about what they represented.

In a house as poor as ours, the cookies were the one thing that I could do special for him. And he would eat them slowly over the next week or so, knowing that he was loved.

The love that I placed into the bag of cookies, made just for him, now had no outlet.

And never would again.

On this side of Heaven.

So, are you like I was?

Are you holding a metaphorical bag of cookies, that now has no home?

Are you screaming, crying, or silently numb, unsure of what to do next?

Has your love lost its receptor?

Without trying to give trite answers, I will say that I understand, completely, and deeply. And my heart aches for the pain you are in.

I am praying that you have friends and family around you, as I did.

I am grateful beyond words for all who walked with my family.

You know who you are. Thank you for all you did.

But I would be more than remiss if I did not thank God for taking me each step of the way through the craziness that surrounded me in the beginning and all the days since.

If you have read this far there is a reason.

God has put on my heart to let you know my story so that you will know that you are not alone, he sees you in your pain of loss, whether that is of a child, partner, or dream.

You are loved!

I pray that you feel that love wash over you as you read these words.

You might not believe in God,

I get it I used to be the same way.

But I have seen Gods hand in my life repeatedly,

and felt his love way too many times to deny him.

I pray that you give him a shot to show you who he is.

Allan didn’t believe in God for most of our marriage.

This changed the last year of his life.

I know that he is in heaven now.

And that I will see him again one day.

And when I do see him again , I sure do hope that some way, somehow, I will be holding  a bag of chocolate chip walnut cookies.