Hi God

 

Do You remember me? The Apple of Your eye?

 

Or at least that is what I thought I was…once upon a time.

 

 

 It does not seem that long ago when my footing was sure and steady

 

When I felt closer to You than my own breath.

 

 

But now I live in a “time of testing”

 

At least that is what I hope it is

 

 

And my footing does not feel so sure anymore

 

And You feel farther than the farthest star

 

  

Worn and battle-scared,  my biggest wounds

 

Are those that I inflict upon myself

 

  

The worry comes as hard and fast as the questions

 

What will become of me and mine?

 

  

Why is this happening?

 

What have I done to deserve this?

 

  

Your back is all I see

 

And Your silence is all I hear

 

  

I wonder when did I turn from the apple of Your eye

 

To the child who slipped in the back door unwanted and ignored

 

  

And then I remember

 

This is not about me

 

  

That is doesn’t matter how I feel

 

Because this about what I know

 

  

So while i feel as if my worst fears will become a reality

 

I know that You have  always been faithful to save

 

  

While feel as if just my back will break from the pressure

 

I know that You will not give me more than I can handle without  You

 

 

 While I feel  so very very alone

 

I know that You will never leave me

 

  

While I feel as if You have brought me all this way for nothing

 

I know that You are faithful to complete what You started

 

  

So I will keep fight this Battle of the Mind

 

In Your name I will charge that hill

 

  

I love You so very much

 

Father, Savior, Friend

 

 

I know that these chains will soon fall off and

 

Things will be restored and made right

 

  

And You will free  me to go and help others

 

who might have forgotten or never knew

 

  

That they, are loved, and treasured,

 

that You long to make them whole

 

  

That You made a way for them to come to You

 

Through Your Son Jesus

  

 

That is does not matter what they have done

 

or how they feel, You love them

 

 

That they, like me, always will be

 

The apple of you eye

 

 

Thank you Father for loving me

 

Signed your Beloved Daughter